Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
