You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
