Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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