She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize
