Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
