Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
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