Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
