you're like a bully in the Christmas story
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
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