the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
