You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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