Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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