I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
well you can't waste a boner
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Can't talk, ducks in the car
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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