all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
