i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
