that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize
