i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
