People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Betty ford says i'm here all night
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
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