Don't you send me to vm
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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