i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Mom said you looked used
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
