we're blogging at a bar
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
