And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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