I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
