If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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