called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Randomize
