I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
