My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Randomize
