this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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