whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I think im going to throw up on grandma
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
That reminds me...we need to get swords
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
