Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Randomize
