We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Randomize
