Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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