Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
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