dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
