I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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