i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
