I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Randomize
