Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize