went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
