the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
We need a shit load of segways right now
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
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