First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
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