What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
