you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
