I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
He did a backflip because drugs
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
