Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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