she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
you made out with another girl for some wings
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
i think im in europe. pls send help
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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