Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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