Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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