Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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