Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
