we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
